1. |
Dystopioids
04:32
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We’re living in fear of a future, that happened yesterday
Desensitized to end of times on our centre stage
Hiding debt like a victim hides abuse
Possessions won’t save you but might disguise a bruise
I’m low on energy, can barely afford it
Flicking through my luxuries picking which to forfeit
On the edge of the 1st world poverty line
Those words taste like the toast of economy wine
It's all relative, knock back a sedative
Depression is a gateway to designer medicines
That help to reach, existential peace
Big pharma’s charge a hefty fee for that recipe
Here we are addicted to Dystopioids
Push it in, slump back and hope for joy
Here we are addicted to Dystopioids
Open wide, cry, try to choke the void
With these drugs, we get by
Keep us numb, from this life
We fuss and we fight
With each rush we decline
We’re only as different as the isms of algorithms
Branching out but our roots twist around system
Let’s talk, sit, measure up our politics
Listen to the opposites but seldom we acknowledge it
In a crowded city where the broken spirits live
Cost of living crisis holds a mirror to our privilege
Dinosaurs beheld a rock called Armageddon falls
We’ll swap a comet for autonomy to end it all
The clock ticks , the nukes are set
Respond quick, pollute what’s left
We are toxic, no news is best
Stop... What a convoluted mess
But whether a peasant or petulant king
Endeavouring heaven or secular wings
Measured by blessings, measured by things
Repellent of weather or dressing the sting
Whatever you’re meant to be, let it be free
In death we are energy speckled in dreams
Remember that we are just sentient beings
Forever’s a meme, we are not evergreen leaves
Here we are addicted to Dystopioids
Push it in, slump back and hope for joy
Here we are addicted to Dystopioids
Open wide, cry, try to choke the void
With these drugs, we get by
Keep us numb, from this life
We fuss and we fight
With each rush we decline
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2. |
Of Sirens and Lycans
06:00
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She's a lady of the sea in an ocean of his better days
Under her blue bemused by his weather change
Tether frayed anchors, keeps him at bay
Whenever she waves it leads him a stray
Sweeps and he sways that wave is tidal
A mermaid service away from his bridle
Lycan, lies can
Lie candid in the eyes of this blind man
She's a siren, that's how he paints guilt
Inhaling the life from her tainted gills
He paints her stills, confined to his picket fence
Powerless to join, the ranks of the wicker men
Feeling spent, embark so steadfast
Sea's always bluer from the yards of dead grass
Of this lycanthrope
She shows a little leg but hides her throat, oh
She will, board your ship
(He knows that she will)
Let the water in
(She knows that he will)
Claw your skin
It's not love, but they'll both fall in
He's the prince of own land, own shores, slow plan
A grown man feels more at home as a nomad
So sad to view what he sails farther from
Every time the breeze frees that harpy's song
Harness that harpoon catch him a fairy-tale
To transfigure to hair and tails
To brush against her burly scales
Crushing out unworldly wails
a murderous tail
For the wish that resides in a murky well
Under the full moon, blood runs red
But the real victim's home alone in their double bed
He awakes half the man
Drained, ashamed, with heart in hand
Darker the sands that harbour his thrill
Washing off the blood from last night's kill
She will, board your ship
(He knows that she will)
Let the water in
(She knows that he will)
Claw your skin
It's not love, but they'll both fall in
Oh Lorelei... Your laurels lie on empty promises
That build kin SHIPS that resemble sarcophagus
Searching for Lochness, danger exhilarates
Blindly believes he'll be safe in that fishy grave
Prays to be prey, forming of fetishes
A ship wrecked mind he walks towards her precipice
Her webs twist, a wretched mess hall
Forlorn oarsman, sync to that vessel
She sings for a heckle, never sought love
Only feels alive when those fangs draw blood
A prank called lust, a dance named death
When the wounds run dry, they'll be no hearts left
After the sex and the blood that's spilt
He comes to, butt for the guilt
So he smothers those gills, a boast of his piety
Returns to his rock, to die slow and silently
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3. |
Voids
05:09
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We all have our voids to fill
This life, this life has its joys kills
A black hole as a shadow, dances beneath me
If I don’t.... It will feed on me
It’s dietary requirements are so specific
It has the taste for things, that weaken my spirit
Verse1:
I was sunken in my drunken place, foraging for numb
Dilution of self, hope tomorrow never comes
Hope it’s swallowed by this fun but nothing ever lasts
Invariably I’ll end up as empty as this glass
You hug me in the dark, berate me in the a.m.
Oh what a costly night, today I make my payment
A slave to that pavement, alien of unrest
Awoke fully clothed with some issues I must undress
Another set of memoirs, sent off into outer space
I’ll be decorated blue by the time that I’ve found my face
Tasting Jekyll notions evoke potions I can’t Hyde
Without mixing these elixirs would you know that I’m alive
Coating my insides, harvest you my liver
Blinded by the lights, hearkening to slivers
Can’t shake the shivers, is it that this river’s gone
The one I used to live upon, shimmers from a distant song
Defined by what kills us
Trying to find something real but...
Our voids swell beneath us
And too much, is never is enough
I have a void, you have a void too
It has the power the devour and destroy you
Or render joy mute, it rumbles underneath
Lately I’ve been craving the sweet nothingness of sleep
Numb, feeling weak, a maddening happiness
Inner saboteur rabbles ‘something bad could happen yet'
A saddened mess, I watch control slip away
Look within to a hole that is fit to gape
Consumerism age, throw in things to fill
With all the world’s will, our voids grow bigger still
Is this how depression feels, the cracking of hardened shell
Is this how my father felt before he used to ask for help
My future failures are haunting me
I’m not the friend, husband, or father that I want to be
Darkness calls mez a light flickers awkwardly
I’ll be ok, as long as I walk toward it’s beam
Defined by what kills us
(Kills us)
Trying to find something real but...
(We’re stuck)
Our voids swell beneath us
Cus too much, will never be enough
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4. |
Stepping Stones
05:38
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I felt my Granddad’s death like a lesson in love and loss
Numb and shocked, for everything thing I’d sundered from
A smouldered home crumbled to ash
The hum of thunder cats, drowned out a hundred spats
I wore middle school like a baggy uniform
Unflattering unsuitable... Casually unusual
Pushed back in upper school debunked the rules
Trying to discover cool but acting like an utter fool
Reached for higher learning with peers at my back
With fears that attached to jeers that attack
I bloomed into my late teens, sprouting possibilities
Complicated feelings freed chopping out the kid in me
I plugged in, logged on to a digital age
A signal for change in the biggest of ways
I eulogise my past never far from its funeral
Fascinated from beyond, the view is truly beautiful
These were my stepping stones, a reflection froze
These were my stepping stone and never know
These were my stepping stones, a reflection froze
These were my stepping stones, and you, never know
First love was metamorphosis, empowered by desire
Deflowered by that fire just another clown for hire
I wore ‘03 like an anchor and a pendant
Sang for her attention with anger and resentment
I saw my Uni days through a truant haze
Of booze and stains on memories I blew away
20 something smelt like the bottom of bottle mixed
With simulated confidence, expelled by the vomit spit
I travelled with a liberty, woven in my essence
Never severed home, made it glow luminescent
The story arc of ’09, a romantic comedy
My co-star offered me, happiness monogamy
Symbolised commitment, wrapped her in a ring
Ecstatic for the win, happy in the spin
I eulogise my past never far from its funeral
Fascinated from beyond this view is truly beautiful
These were my stepping stones, a reflection froze
These were my stepping stone and never know
These were my stepping stones, a reflection froze
These were my stepping stones, and you, never know
I Treated my career like a means to an end
It’s hard to be a successful with these demons in your head
Felt the weight of my promotions, a suffocating crush
Juddered by the thrust, comfort is a must
I wore thirty like a crown of fabricated regal
Seated on a throne of that inflated ego
Mental diagnosis offered deeper understanding
Of the cards that I’d been handed that feature in my sadness
Fatherhood toppled my priorities
No deity but believe me that was godspeed
Covid19 felt like the end of times
Attitude was never mind, plenty of reflection time
Now as 40 looms I’ve learned to let it go
Although lesson never slow, I’m better for their blows
I eulogise my past never far from that funeral
Fascinated from beyond this view is truly beautiful
These were my stepping stones, a reflection froze
These were my stepping stone and never know
These were my stepping stones, a reflection froze
These were my stepping stones, and you, never know
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5. |
Curriculum Vitae
04:02
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So my name is a number, age is a measurement
Of these an equation, ambiguous relevance
Score my efforts, they border obsessive
For every room I enter, sworn to its exit
My self esteem rolls on empty
I’m prone to let the moment take the breath from me
Ever since a pup been trying to figure out what normal is
If I could be anything, I’d be disappointed
I have been a bovine, branded for the puppeteers
Strings woven into lips, pull a smile up to cheer
A lieutenant in strangers war
A cadaver for the platter of voracious hordes
White collar ghost, haunting a swivel chair
Telephone voice, a caller who isn’t there
A spoke on a wheel in that rat race
That yearns for the freedom in the stillness of the stagnate
There’s no glory in résumé
Nothing for me on their terrain
They won’t call in to bless your wake
Mourn when your breath's abate
Your just awning on their estate
So you can count my capabilities with symbolised lettering
So I can be a product of my lessoning
A square peg to round hole curriculum
A simian, burning effigy of minion
Indifferent... to the snake and the ladder
Success... greed served on the same platter
Bachelor of elsewhere, mastered in avoidance
I disembark from crafts less poignant
Horror... my warm kiss, another realm to seep into
But nothing’s as vicious as the evening news
A keen tongue for poisons that draw out my own
The bejewelling of a fools crown... throne
Music... my therapist an edifice of reminiscence
everything is prettiest from generous distances
Be harsh, be hurtfully analytic
Just know I’m my own worst critic
There’s no glory in résumé
Nothing for me on their terrain
They won’t call in to bless your wake
Mourn when your breath's abate
Your just awning on their estate
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6. |
Blood & Fortune
05:07
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7. |
Rainbow Paint
04:46
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And you arrived in the finest moment
... that I'd ever seen to date
Never thought we’d see the day such an eager wait
But it was worth every second just to see your face
And now I know that I've never seen a cleaner slate
Reflected in those large eyes
That have never seen harshness of dark night
I want to shield and conceal you from this harsh life
It hurts to know I'll try but I can't quite
How can I raise you in a world I don't understand
Just like those nine months of worry that your mother had
Those that came before you never made it to the mother land
We were so scared, never make it to be a mum and dad
No religion but prayed and beckoned
And proved you don’t have to die to take your place in heaven
May the 2nd, we awaited breathless
Heard that first cry and that worldly weight ascended
You paint colours on horizons
That hosted thunder, lightning
You made your mother smile when you...
Came to us, a sacred love
That painted us, anew
Your daddy's made a mess I plea
... that you is how they'll measure me
Don't take that as pressure please, you're just the best of me
Next to you, all else is secondary
My beautiful daughter so much more than a legacy
With a smile that can melt away a rough day
Canvas raining grey ‘til you painted it with sun rays
She carried you through discomfort, aches and pains
And a concern for you that stayed and never came to fade
When I was low the thought of your arrival gave me hope
I’d had a tough few years I was jaded broke
It’s safe to say in a way you really made me whole
I feel your love even though you can’t say... those
...eyes speak a thousand words perfect
Even though, you haven’t said your first yet
No vernacular, characters or words yet
To describe how I felt when we first met
Mummy says your a miracle
I don’t believe in them, but I believe in you
You paint colours on horizons
That hosted thunder, lightning
You made your mother smile when you...
Came to us, a sacred love
That painted us, anew
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8. |
The Shadow of that Tree
06:11
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He paved his own road to become a man
His father was a red flag, an unlucky hand
Distance gave perspective he could understand
He felt the breeze of flight under his mother’s span
Above the shadow of that tree
He catches his mother's eyes, pry into his soul
And wonders if she sees that monster smiling at those windows
Scared to be the remnants of a bad dream
Or the echoes that remain of his dad’s screams
He unravels genes, emotions and memories
In search of anything remotely hereditary
Their DNA that weaves the same, venom through his veins
He liberated from, severing that second name
Hugs can constrict, starve you of breath
Held hands, can pull apart... clench
See he watched that tall oak communicate with branches
Clasped around throats, hopes go unanswered
Soaked up hurt, grew cold and alert
In order to clean , a sponge must know dirt
He refused to be lowered by that label of a father’s son
Raised by an angel, moonlit in martyrdom
He paved his own road to become a man
His father was a red flag, an unlucky hand
Distance gave perspective he could understand
He felt the breeze of flight under his mother’s span
Above the shadow of that tree
Somewhere in the trenches...of his adolescence
Stood a door between him and a wolf’s aggression
It unsettled him, wrestling who to let in
To wonder was that claw war, or protection
Affection and acceptance can’t be quantified
2.4 summarises, why he feels so ostracised
In a picket fence village from a wholesome road
Street lamps flicker over broken homes
Alone he’d escape into chords and keys
Where he could be more than just fallen leaves
He found father figures in those figurines
Had dreams they’d smash his unease into smithereens
A jigsaw with a missing piece struggles with its imaging
Until he found colours to fill within that lineage
He refuses to be lowered by that label of a father’s son
Raised by an angel, moonlit in martyrdom
He paved his own road to become a man
His father was a red flag, an unlucky hand
Distance gave perspective he could understand
He felt the breeze of flight under his mother’s span
Above the shadow of that tree
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9. |
Scream Queen
04:45
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Well, I fear these last days of Rome might endure for eternity
If we persist gnawing on hands that are nurturing
She’ll desert us leave us to dirt and sea
Open welcome arms to returning comets hurtling
Nursing sleep through unearthly screams
Ringing bells that yell out emergency
lights flashing red, illuminate a murder scene
She’s already dead, all we can do is curb the bleed
Instead we press our stems to that gash and drink
And proclaim it a magic trick
A talisman embellishing a wish
But happiness expires the second is exists
Everything dies and everything rots and
Everything's alive until it's forgotten
Eventually everything’s history
We pluck quills, sterilise villainy
You can hear her weeping
She offered up her body, We modified it
She gave us her love, we sodomised it
She offered up her heart, we ostracised it
She gave up everything, we monetised it
Satellites capture x-rays, she’s broken internally
A cancerous mass like a map of a murky sea
A shoreline of mercenaries
Or a serpent on that tree that bought about the curse of eve
Are we’re the worst of these
Less like Inhabitants, more like a purge, disease
She screams out... mercy please
But can’t be heard over the murmurs of all our needs
So all that we’ve built and believed in
Will clear disappear, return to the ether
Control is a finite illusion
We the victims of own convolution
Conclusion, a mother smothered by her own litters greed
Nipples bleed out to a whittled feed
Living in the shadow of her former glory
The darkest chapters of a cautionary story, pour me.
You can hear her weeping
She offered up her body, We modified it
She gave us her love, we sodomised it
She offered up her heart, we ostracised it
She gave up everything, we monetised it
We’ve polluted her bloodstream with our yesterdays
Built monuments of us on her cherry face
Gorged on her flesh weaponised bones
buried her majesty, erected thrones
Tore out hair... bunches, clumps
Introduced smoke to her undeveloped lungs
Immersed her in tears of our own doing
And we’ve raped with an entitlement...
So exclusively human
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10. |
||||
So, Everything is prettiest from far away
Even scars can carry charm through a sparkled frame
Mental health romanticised and streamed into our living rooms
Has nothing on the oceans exploding in our swimming pools
Tired of feeling overwhelmed in a mess so infectious
You need to know abandon isn’t always reckless
Our common ground is death, scatter me across it
Our matter doesn’t matter, nor the value of our objects
Fiends for our tablets sedated in avarice
Creatures of habit just trying to find some happiness
Just another broken one picking up it’s pieces
When they don’t fit trying to fight the urge to leave it
For everyone a demon, angels are in short supply
Until we’re left for dead, with those that fallen from high
So why am I under it’s spell
But how my gonna fix the world when I cant fix myself
Life is brief but beautiful
Breathe it in consume the call
Kill the king and overhaul
Snip the strings and own the fall
Let go
Time will teach but kill it’s class
Freedom lives in wilted past
Behind a rose that tints the glass
I don’t know of this can last
Let go
So I’ve seen the purity of these and grazed on their presence
Humanity in rare form, endeavours for collection
I’ll tether to those bonds, but seldom much else
And use that proximity to measure my wealth
Rats race in a maze for the gaudiest grave
I face the breeze and that performance of wave
Sunrays are hands of reassurance on a tough day
Cleansing hours under showers dancing to that thunders shake
Every cry for help rings a different tone
Adjust your eye line to sky lines, know your not alone
We’re all aboard this rocket ship for advancement sake
Feted by that hell fire left its wake
I walk adjacent to the barrels of Ill fated crabs
Finding roses over slabs I pick them with these wilted hands
Ants hunt and gather for a fraudulent queen
I live a life that is awfully me
Life is brief but beautiful
Breathe it in consume the fall
Kill the king and overhaul
Snip the strings and own the fall
Let go
Time will teach but kill it’s class
Freedom lives in wilted past
Behind a rose that tints the glass
I don’t know of this can last
Let go
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11. |
Fish Bowl Furnishings
04:09
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Confined to a mind, defiant to its wiring
Inside a head, I quietly hide within
Bound to a skin I’m not comfortable in
Defined by the colours of our kin
Constrained by values, beliefs handmade
Some second hand, some in our DNA
Enslaved to our expectations
Chained to what’s left when we fail them
On a street where these neighbours are strangers
At a gameshow carousel of saviours
Tied to a job of mutual indifference
That will never reciprocate what we give to it
Lost in a broken dream
On an island drifting out to open sea
Further away from its continent
Tethered to our history measured by it’s obelus
A grain of sand, a spec of dust
A vacant plan, a lesser fuss
Inflated worth, A chemical cocktail
An ancient curse, embers of lost grail
You’re someone’s sanctum, on this lonely sphere
At best that’s something, at worst a smear
The bigger picture, can be so unclear
But If your mark is missing it would feel so insincere
In the arms of a mother that knows we’ll be the death of her
Close enough to smell our poison on the breathe of her
Sinking in sand, trapped in an hour glass
Wasting time, trying to make an hour last
Beyond our own mortality
Detracted by illusions of our own majesty
Atop a rock that spins just right
Tipped toward a light that permits this life
A finite fin swimming in eternity
Unable to see beyond our fish bowl furnishings
Beneath sparks of bright scatterings
An expanding masterpiece thrives in a galaxy
Cloaked in the vastness of universe
That’s blind to our rule of this ruined dirt
Behind a limelight of cosmic magnificence
intricate, solemnly, insignificant
A grain of sand, a spec of dust
A vacant plan, a lesser fuss
Inflated worth, A chemical cocktail
An ancient curse, embers of lost grail
You’re someone’s sanctum, on this lonely sphere
At best that’s something, at worst a smear
The bigger picture can be so unclear
But If your mark is missing it would feel so insincere
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12. |
Eulogy for the Living
05:02
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So If you read between the lines on his withered skin
There’s story but no one is listening
All that’s left laid to rest in cardboard tombs
Sits awaiting death in a stark old room
Where a person can turn to a burden
So he dresses in a shirt and ties a noose to that world missed
Man of house, patriarch, bread winner
Reduced to a guest in a home less familiar
Only blood he sees bubbles in syringes
That stings to remind him of his innings
Just another anchor on that ocean floor
A topic of discussion of which treasures are spoken for
He prayed until the days he felt unheard
Discovered darkness, remembered that he loved her
And fights the urge to give in
Now the memories of her are his religion
Ruins hide the wisdom
Youth in equilibrium
Beautify the killing
When we eulogise the living
Euthanise decisions
The future I’m misgiving
Dehumanise the victim
When we eulogise the living
I hope you live to see your loneliest days
What a felonious phrase
I’m just charmed by your stoic ways
I hope you live to see your loneliest days
What I was hoping to say
That the world needs your knowing grace
Bless the young
They seldom come
For a severed tongue
Or breathless lungs
Some swan songs are best unsung
So If you read between the lines on her weathered face
there’s a story that emanates of better days
She can blink away a decade but seconds take an age
Trapped in a body only memories escape
That TV flickers images of foreign times
Feels like she’s fossilising, but not the eyes
Carer, matriarch, stronghold
Reduced to a stranger in a foreign home
Her train of thoughts run on abandoned lines
Recognising stops but the tracks won’t oblige
A kaleidoscope mind obscures and frustrates
Trying to figure out the images before they decay
Her inner child chasing coherence like butterflies
For everyone she catches another dies
She pines the night might take her in her sleep
So she can be graceful in her defeat
Ruins hide the wisdom
Youth in equilibrium
Beautify the killing
When we eulogise the living
Euthanise decisions
The future I’m misgiving
Dehumanise the victim
When we eulogise the living
I hope you live to see your loneliest days
What a felonious phrase
I’m just charmed by your stoic ways
I hope you live to see your loneliest days
What I was hoping to say
That the world needs your knowing grace
Bless the young
They seldom come
For a severed tongue
Or breathless lungs
Some swan songs are best unsung
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13. |
Vice Grips
06:02
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A faster food, a slower death
Additives subtract until the souls bereft
Left to hunt and gather where it’s mass produced
Convenience requires that we have to loose
Choose lust just pretend its love
The idea alone, is a deadly drug
Choose one religion dismiss the rest
Repeat cycle, sin, repent, then confess
Wi-fi connects us to a world shrunk
Pulls us further apart, snap, curl up
Shut the door scramble communion
Simulate a life, from the room you live
Views and ticks hits and trends
In the land of the smartphone living dead
Crave likes and mentions a vain acceptance
Gratified by a crazed faceless assemblage
The chasm surrounds us
Mimics our calling
A tandem of cowards
Willing to fall in
The chasm has found us
And it has found us wanting
Ship sinks
I drown
Chains, links
Wrapped ‘round
Ship sinks
I drown
Bewitched
Dumbfound
The light shines the wheels spins
Need the roll of a dice just to feel things
Buying anything to fill an empty void
Rent attention with intentions of expensive noise
Poised, in a fashion curd
Vacant logos brand us to the cattle herd
Here’s your value worth, a wearied pot
Sound the soirée, Reaper in your earshot
Best years lost, forever hate your age
Yearn the surgeon’s knife, desecrate your face
It’s a rat race, no finish line
Pace is trivial, keep within the lines
Go against design become binary code
Ones and Ohs stuck in lines and rows
Until we’re devoid, obsoleted
Enslaved to ploys of our choice achievement
The chasm surrounds us
Mimics our calling
A tandem of cowards
Willing to fall in
The chasm has found us
And it has found us wanting
Ship sinks
I drown
Chains, links
Wrapped ‘round
Ship sinks
I drown
Bewitched
Dumbfound
Liquor rush anything to live it up
Relinquish inhibitions of this British blush
Riddled drunk, comfortable in this slump
Life is easier when you don’t give a
Popping party drugs, give the liver rest
Dancing on your grave while you dig that trench
Inhale a little death exhale a bitter stress
Cigarette smoke silhouettes a bigger mess
Inward breathe
In those weeds a jest, mischief and fret
Prescription pills to take away your ills
Tethered to that heal to test your will
Under pressure chill float in opiates
So when life is real you’ll never notice it
Open wrists sick of that gruelling numb
Cut until you feel that the rule of thumb
The chasm surrounds us
Mimics our calling
A tandem of cowards
Willing to fall in
The chasm has found us
And it has found us wanting
Ship sinks
I drown
Chains, links
Wrapped ‘round
Ship sinks
I drown
Bewitched
Dumbfound
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14. |
Effigies of Yesterday
04:06
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With age and neglect a change is thrust
A face of rust flakes to dust
Wake me up to the age simplicity
Before we debunked every strain of infinity
Wisdom heaves regret, self-doubt
The silent screams I cant yell out
Time ebbs down stream flows to a spill
Cascades upon plains when it’s over the hill
A sobering chill beholding the drown
And the parts me I banished to a ghost town
Slow down to watch myself haunt these walkways
The streets, fields, buildings and hallways
All day I wonder where my time escaped to
Slipped through the cracks id hacked for a break through
Make do a mantra of tantrums
Couldn’t see the prison bars for the sanctum
The earliest
Stencils I shaded are theirs to dandle
Nestled in the frames of my parents mantle
Adolescence shaped by pressure and vandal
Measured by the grades of every lesson valued
When I came of age to stress so tangible
Stepped on stage where they hecklers wrangle
Blessed was the day I’d neglect the manual
Tear the pages, Undressed the tangle
Merited the fade and the debts we gamble
accepted the way that my errant candle... drips
All my effigies of yesterday
Dance with vigour through that cleansing flame
To the songs of days I had wished away
So I’m caught between worlds sleeved in a chrysalis
Weaved in bereavement, grieving my innocence
Reminiscent quivers get the best of me
Just another symptom of my hypersensitivity
The highs of simplicity revel in that ore
Flashbacks execute a nausea
Pause for a second gawp horizons
Where arteries have forked and divided
4
Caution and silence, my two best friends
Remembering an age where bruise met sin
Loose met win but they both were impostors
And either one could morph to monster
Lost so many days to the spoils of illusion
I’ve since twisted to a coil of convolution
Confused when I found that my heroes draw blood
What maudlin lens to explore love
The earliest
Stencils I shaded are theirs to dandle
Nestled in the frames of my parents mantle
Adolescence shaped by pressure and vandal
Measured by the grades of every lesson valued
When I came of age to stress so tangible
Stepped on stage where they hecklers wrangle
Blessed was the day I’d neglect the manual
Tear the pages, Undressed the tangle
Merited the fade and the debts we gamble
accepted the way that my errant candle... drip
All my effigies of yesterday
Dance with vigour through that cleansing flame
To the songs of days I had wished away
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15. |
Low Beast
05:08
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So tell me If I paint a smile, maybe you can love more
Dressed as a clown with a propensity for blood and gore
Summon war, roused in the rubble
On a quest for courage, I found trouble
Double Dutch fumbles from contorted mouth
Conjures damp rising from this haunted house
Fawning sprouts whispers from a spirits tongue
Draws me to the woods where the witches hung
Until they swung, hanged from the oaks brittle branch
Very same tree my initials carved
Armed with harpoon to kill coy
And fears I have known since a little boy
Fill the void until it’s neat peat at 6 feet
Where blackouts are the step dad of the big sleep
Riddled heap A.M. another failed exorcism
Bad blood dripping from a head that’s splitting
So I drink to forget but begin remember
Left my heart in that snowy December
Tend to consume ‘til I darken the room
Sit and watch Venus as the Martians loom
Then I drink to empowerment but cower in its wake
The blood the beast spills is sour in its taste
I tend to consume, ‘til the laughter balloons
And bursts on this party of two
As medicament simmers to poison
A blue funk sings the dawn in
Even thinner blood dries by morning
For they can only love me when I’m you
I can Hyde behind this lie
But I can’t Hyde you
So in the coming of an age I stumbled on a treasure trove
Unbeknownst was the curse on that embezzled gold
You never know the price until the pockets turned
Pissed away my youth into a shoddy urn
Watch, learn, listen a fool hardy party trick
I can arm a timid misfit with charm and wit
A Discarded magic, old hat rabbit bundled in
Catching sympathetic jeers at family function
Breathe dysfunction, never felt enough
But I can harness super powers when I thin the blood
Mix up potions Hyde from the jackals
A shy teen shined when prescribed what the adults gulp
Sculpt away the weak mould
Lions mouth ajar social media freak show
My people caught a creature they caught on a camera phone
And I seem to share some features with that animal
So I drink to forget but begin remember
I left my heart in that snowy December
I tend to consume ‘til I darken the room
Sit and watch Venus as the Martians loom
Then I drink to empowerment but cower in its wake
The blood the beast spills is sour in its taste
I tend to consume, ‘til the laughter balloons
And bursts on this party of two
As medicament simmers to poison
A blue funk sings the dawn in
Even thinner blood dries by morning
For they can only love me when I’m you
I can Hyde behind a lie
But I can’t Hyde you
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16. |
con.VOL.clusion
05:46
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Entangled with the roots of this synthetic tree
Surrendered to its fruits so pathetically
Truth evades the hours where subjective weaves
You can’t flower press with dishevelled leaves
These bloodied hands pass the buck devalue it
These fingerprints are plastered, so claret red
I mourn every second spent that I haven’t kept
Those nestled in our Venn a diagram of sacrament
And on days that I feel like I’m dying
I look to the light that my children provide when
Bedlam consumes every morsel of brightness
Remind us we’re more than our quietus
There’s nothing left In the halls of our conquest
Picking up the dead in a war we haven’t lost yet
I’m just a mirror image riddled with our concepts
Hoping someone qualified can simmer down this hot mess
And on the days when I feel like I’m dying
Fright strikes a chord to hymn of enlightenment
I want to seize the day but I’m not sure how
My weaknesses enabled me a conduit of doubt
I want to seize the day but I’m not sure how
As a bead in a wave, a modicum of ground
I want to seize the day but I’m not sure how
Seeking a way to be lost in the now
Alas, there is animus in suffering
Magic in our utterance, our majesty is buffering
I want to walk away but I have to stay
This lawn I’ve arranged must have it’s day
I want to walk away but I have to stay
Every doorway and gate poorly handmade
I want to walk away but I have to stay
I was forged by the flames of our habits craved
Alas, there is absence of mother ship
Tragedy that underpins our flagships of current wins
We place a veil of necessity over the crude the callings of our desires
We, the masters of justification
We have normalised dystopia
Paved the roads that lead us there with notions of adventure
We have been taught greed carefully kneaded into the shape of success, pay it forward
Celebrate it at any and all costs
We have created such grandiose complexities, our achievements are noteworthy
Yet we fail to comprehend their true meaning and worth
As pride is in the eye of the creator
We have imagined gods, fashioned them from ideas and rubble
We live in shadows of things that have grown beyond their purpose, beyond the reach of our stewardship
Beyond us
Blissfully unaware... led by a spark of our own ignition
We have basked in our own glory for too long, blinded by its blaze
The buoyancy of our ego and self worth may not weather this storm
The point of no return may already have its date etched on a milestone disguised as glorious structure
Thankfully we are not footnote, not paragraph, nor sentence, nor word or even letter
A typo maybe?
Withal, the seeds we plant may just reveal the answers that have eluded us
That is a notion we should embrace Build the new worlds upon it
It should have never come to this
We were meant for so much more
Our numbers are too many
For all of our trials, passions, accomplishments and connections
We are significantly, Antagonist
Yet there is wonder in our wander starlight in our passion, flashed of utopia on our horizons and in our peripheral
And beautiful purpose in our complex tapestry
It should have been so much more simple
This should have been a sentient dream
If only we had just
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